Personhood: our personal feelings
A while ago our system met an interesting being and joined a space we will refer to simply as JT. Upon joining Lettie (who was host at the time) was asked a very simple question, one that would have a lot of repercussions; "are you a person?". It might sound a simple question and yet it made us stop and think for a moment, and then Lettie responded simply with, no. At the time is was simply because she felt less like a person and more like an object. It is worth noting she was in a depressive spiral and close to collapse at the time, actively seeking a suicide by ego death. But the importance of that answer can't be understated.
So this eventually brings us to an interesting follow up question "What is a person?" and from that, comes the original question of "Are you a person?". Every individual will have a different answer to the what a person is and as a result their answer to are they a person may change depending on who's definition is in use or of it is their personal definition. Within our system there are 4 main fronters, lettiel (angelself and the main author of this post), Lettie, Scar and Sammy. Each of the four of us consider ourselves not a person, but each of us do so for different reasons and under different definitions. The rest of this article will be each of us briefly explaining our feelings and definitions. Potentially in the future, other headmates will also add their thoughts here.
lettiel:
Take a moment and think about society. A group of people working together, working to support each other to survive. Untill they don't. You stick out too much, do something they don't like, have a sexual orientation or gender that doesn't align with their "right" and suddenly you aren't a part of that anymore. You quickly find yourself being stripped of your personhood. Made to be less then them. So that when they exclude and discriminate against you, they don't have reason to feel guilty. It lets them safely strip away your rights because those are something "people have". If you aren't a person you don't deserve them. It makes you easier to hate, and that creates an endless cycle.
The worst part is, you can't even defend yourself once this cycle begins. Instead you are too busy proving your personhood, fighting just to be allowed the privilege. You can fit in, be quiet and try to appease them, or you can stick out, fight for your rights and have that taken from you. So angel takes that choice from them, she refuses her personhood, the very thing they try to use against her, now a thing she chooses. She chooses to reject the expectations of society and live by her own values instead, deciding right and wrong on her own moral compass.
Lettie:
A person: a human individual who follows societies rules. But I'm not human, I'm an angel, a puppy, a cat, a cow, a doll and sometimes an object although I have mostly moved past that episode. Being human comes with responsibilities and commitments, ones I carried for the better part of 8 years. Those responsibilities nearly killed me when the weight of them became to much to bear. So now I am finally free of them and gladly shed the burden of personhood along with them. I care little for what society thinks of me anymore, I stopped needing to. When I stopped being host, I stopped being the one at risk of society choosing otherwise. I stopped needing to follow the rules, so I have no need to care what they think.
Scar:
A person is a member of society and part of a very particular structure. One that doesn't fit with me. I am predator and prey. The hunt manifest. The existence I choose to live is not a structure which fits well with how society functions. So I can choose to try to fit in and forever be an outcast, or accept my place is not part of that and as long as that is the case I am not a person. I'm ok with that, it suits me, I don't care much for those structures anyway. Those who knows me for me love me for who I am, and that is enough.
Sammy:
My views on personhood are likely the most extreme of the system, and maybe the most depressing. To be a person is a privilege, it is a thing to be earnt. The others may disagree, some of them even fight against the idea of wanting to be a person. But to me, to be a person is to grow, to learn and to become more, but it is also to be kind, to care for and protect and to be cared for and protected. I failed those I love, tore them apart with my own bare hands, and in doing so lost that privilege. While I hope to one day regain it, that day is far off.